Truth be told, the person that's most challenging to get meaningful time with...is my wife.

A few months ago, a coaching client asked me how I organize my days and weeks. 

He specifically asked, "How do you make time each week for the people that matter most to you?”

My reply, “My to-do list comes from a “weekly goal sheet.”

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“Every week, I create targets I need to hit. My wife’s name, and each of my kids’, are listed on that sheet. If they’re not,” I replied, “I can go weeks, even months, without having a truly meaningful experience with one or more of the people that matter most to me. My goal is to have 4 meaningful experiences with each of them each week. I check them on my sheet when they happen.”

To be clear, these aren't grand gestures, vacations, "special events" or experiences, but simple ones. A conversation while shooting free throws. A quiet drive to school where something real is shared. A walk with the dogs down a quiet road. An influential conversation at breakfast.          It has to mean that our relationship has improved.

That list forces me to be intentional.

It’s easier with our younger boys. They’re home more. Fewer activities. Less technology. But as kids grow, their worlds expand—cars, friends, sports, responsibilities. Pinning them down for meaningful time takes more intention and effort.

I know it sounds robotic. But if my aim is to be an engaged dad, and leader, this sheet holds me accountable. I do the same with our key leaders at Lone Oak. Without intention, weeks can pass without any real engagement.

Truth be told, the person that's most challenging to get meaningful time with...is my wife.

I’m not talking about the hundreds of logistical conversations we have each week. I’m talking about the deeper moments we need to continue growing together. I’m not proud of that reality, but I get it.

We manage a lot. She’s also very independent and relatively needless. And at the end of a long and tiring day, she’s the easiest to postpone.

The kids are growing into independence, but they still depend on us. Making time for her is one of my focal points this year.

Adding to the challenge, we live in a world that's void of meaningful experiences. Much of our world operates in a desperate vacuum. Money is usually used to counteract that vacuum. So we spend a lot of money chasing a false sense of balance.

The hamster runs faster and faster to reach the water dish, exhausted, never realizing the water is just a few steps off the wheel. It doesn’t need more effort. It needs intention.

It’s not about trying harder.
It’s about trying smarter.

Lone Oak is a place where meaningful things actually happen. There’s less distraction. No bright lights, bells, whistles, sugar rushes, or constant adrenaline.

Just slow walks. Squirrels playing. Animals to pet. Fish to catch. Or laughing at your dad trying to play pickleball.

Then sitting quietly on a bench in The Grove as the sun goes down.

Take a breath this new year.
Come find peace.

Be intentional about creating meaningful experiences with the people you love—
in ways you thought were extinct.

And watch how many challenges quietly fade.

Remain encouraged,
Brian