Kids These Days

Did they catch a fish? No.
But that wasn’t the goal. Making the pole was.

They spent hours as inventors, creators, gathers, problem-solvers, communicators and teammates.

Kids These Days...


The title is a term we’ve heard for decades…maybe even centuries.


We, adults, tend to romanticize own youth by remembering the good and forgetting the bad. Therefore, comparing today’s kids unfairly by idealizing versions of our own past.


“When I was young, we played outside all day!”
We forget we also argued, fought, got bored, and stared at a TV for hours.


As far back as 400 BC, Socrates shared, “The children now love luxury. They have bad manners and contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants…”


Geez!


Recently, I witnessed something I wish everyone could see: 

PROOF that “kids these days” (and not just my 4) are just as good—maybe even better—than ever.


A few weeks ago, I took my 11-year-old and a friend with me to Lone Oak. They spent the morning saying hello to the animals in the animal farm, playing PickleBall, shooting baskets and exploring the woods. 

Late in the morning, they stopped by my office to grab their lunch and eat on a bench near a pond. 


I had just gotten off the phone when the boys finished their sandwiches and came through my office door.


And then "it" began. After ALL they had done that morning, they were still sharing those 2 famous words every parent loves to hear (cynicism) at some point during the first week of summer vacation, “We’re bored.”

I stopped to hunt for an idea. 

Got it!


“Go make a fishing pole," I blurted out.

 

So they did—using a stick, a paper clip, some old twine from a barn, a grasshopper, and a rock.

Did they catch a fish? No.
But that wasn’t the goal. Making the pole was.

They spent hours as inventors, creators, gathers, problem-solvers, communicators and teammates.


Two hours later, they set the pole aside. We headed for home.

They asked if I’d hit “fly balls” to them in the front yard. I did.

When I got interrupted with a phone call or someone stopping by, they tossed the ball to each other—outside, in the sun, heat and humidity - patient, content, and fully present with one another.


Meanwhile, my 15-year-old daughter and some friends asked politely if they could go canoeing. They found life jackets and went.

Later, after coming home from their excursion, they jumped on the trampoline and played wiffle ball until dark.


As the stars came out, I helped them build a campfire in our backyard. They sat around it, talking. No cursing. No alcohol. No drugs. Just teenagers being teenagers.


I brought out plates of spaghetti. Each one responding with a “Thank you.” They were grateful.


I found a place in my favorite living room chair, watching the campfire in the backyard out the window and through the blinds, as our group of 14 and 15-year-olds laughed and chatted.


Just beyond the fire, I saw the light on in my shop. My 17-year-old had pulled out my car to turn the space into a makeshift barbershop. He’s giving friends haircuts, playing music, and joking.


My 11-year-old is inside, quietly watching a show with his “fishing pole” buddy—worn out from a full day of building, exploring, discovering while not catching fish.


So, when people talk about “kids these days,” I think of moments like this. It’s not just my kids—it’s their friends, classmates, and teammates. Are they perfect? No. Are they wonderful humans? Absolutely.


Sure, some of them are sitting around the fire scrolling on their phones. It’s 9 p.m.—most adults are doing the same thing in their living rooms. Can you blame them? They’ve never known a world without technology.


These kids laugh and joke.
They whine, complain, encourage, argue, scream, cry, and cheer.
They feel left out, included, lonely, loved.

All in a day. Just like we did years ago.


Getting frustrated with the time kids spend on their devices is like handing a drug addict marijuana and becoming annoyed when they light it up.


We created the world they live in.

So let’s stay in it with them.


Create a space like Lone Oak or your backyard with another option outside of a screen or device. 

But above all, just share your time with them.

Your devoted, intentional time. Leave your "distraction" on your bedroom dresser,  your work challenges at the office and your financial situation at the bank.


They want that time with you.


Go find your bat, glove, walking shoes, umbrella, fishing pole, lawn chair, firewood, baseball cap, garden gloves or knee brace. (all of which can be used at Lone Oak) 


Count your blessings.
Love deeply.


Remain encouraged.

— Brian



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